the world is over now i shut my eyes to the past and look forward now.
i strain my fingers let them flow like fluid.
only in this lucidity shall i get what i aim for.
people have come and people have gone ..
sadness and despair have passed the soul. this time is not the time to weep but hold ur head up and stare at the face of misery . laugh hysterically and mock the pain that resides in you.
its time to open up and type ur cramps away.
write like u had to die tomorrow .
the author in u awakes not by force but by the violent turbulence and the urge to write/
to write as it should be written and to write with the animosity of great intellectual gaiety.
to celebrate words and their comninations to take out music from the lines like a great composer.
the time has come never to go back.
as i put forth the words of this millenium .
all that follows i dont care al that was is bygone .
this is my life and I embrace it with open arms coz this is what i love to do.
i see the horizon a new one and God has made it beautiful .
amen brothers sisters
those who i have hurt and those who hurt me
this sentimentalist is gone he is going to use all ur provocations in work of his own.
he is going to create worlds out of those real hard feeling u gave him./
he is going to make music from hay.
because he is a words man and he never gonna die.
amen
bearded philosopher
Friday, January 23, 2009
bliss for a second missed forever
its been a long time. Today we will go through the basics of what happened the other day to me. well it did perturb me to an extent which demanded my returning to my damned blog. damned for reasons some people would know. any way its unholy to digress at this point i would never get to the simple fat story.
a normal day in office yesterday and i just asked a cool girl to have ice cream on a bright sat sunny morning near her house. my reasons were plenty , i have seldom talked to her so i decide to bring in the comfort level first. So here comes my innovative suggestions... close to her house ( she can run away at a point of any distress) ice cream ( everybody loves ice cream) and broad daylight( this really is pretty simple to understand)
and stating my facts and assuring her that i was not on any police record she agreed.
that was it that was simple and i was happy. happy after a long time that i had actually something to look forward to . it s not a bit easy to be happy these days, nt one bit. growing uncertainity almost makes u yelp in fright. but ya i was happy, i was happy in broad daylight.
and today friday i was apprehensive of a possible set back to my current state of gaiety and thw worse happened before my very eyes. she called it off. and so my mood goes and its like 3 pm and i haven't completed my work. y m i getting so off today coz that happens when something happy is takene away from u as simply as it was given to u.
i give up man, broad daylight and ice cream.is it too much to ask?
why cant be things simple and people learn to accept friends staring at their face.
why cant it be simple yet beautiful.
i fail to understand but an urge to write precedes the urge to shout at the sky. thats happiness taken out of happiness and i know its crazy and life is crazy. u never get what u want and u sometimes feel ur right. thats what life is being there holding on and breaking loose.
let the wind guide u my friend.
let it be ur torch //amen
a normal day in office yesterday and i just asked a cool girl to have ice cream on a bright sat sunny morning near her house. my reasons were plenty , i have seldom talked to her so i decide to bring in the comfort level first. So here comes my innovative suggestions... close to her house ( she can run away at a point of any distress) ice cream ( everybody loves ice cream) and broad daylight( this really is pretty simple to understand)
and stating my facts and assuring her that i was not on any police record she agreed.
that was it that was simple and i was happy. happy after a long time that i had actually something to look forward to . it s not a bit easy to be happy these days, nt one bit. growing uncertainity almost makes u yelp in fright. but ya i was happy, i was happy in broad daylight.
and today friday i was apprehensive of a possible set back to my current state of gaiety and thw worse happened before my very eyes. she called it off. and so my mood goes and its like 3 pm and i haven't completed my work. y m i getting so off today coz that happens when something happy is takene away from u as simply as it was given to u.
i give up man, broad daylight and ice cream.is it too much to ask?
why cant be things simple and people learn to accept friends staring at their face.
why cant it be simple yet beautiful.
i fail to understand but an urge to write precedes the urge to shout at the sky. thats happiness taken out of happiness and i know its crazy and life is crazy. u never get what u want and u sometimes feel ur right. thats what life is being there holding on and breaking loose.
let the wind guide u my friend.
let it be ur torch //amen
Thursday, August 21, 2008
THE CROSS
nusrat sat down on the leather chair,his face drawn ,expressionless.he had crystal blue eyes but his gaze carried far off into a world of his own.the plump man sitting across him was definitely getting irritated.
"this is the second time"-he said"and ur still not sorry?"
silence.
"i am sorry"-nusrat said.
"and..."urged the man.
"that the world is full of the dumbest people i know and u have successfully gained a position in my list."
"you have left me no choice"the man bellowed.
"there is always one more choice"nusrat said as if to himself.
going to a flashback in this part of a story is not good.even the readers expect that.but readers want reason of the characters they confront.and all this would only deepen a sense of satisfaction.so be it.
"i told my mommy"-nusrat
"and ur mommy allowed u?"he asked.
"she agrees that crime and punishment come to honourable men"-he said
"so u agree that u have committed a crime?"the man said lit with hope.
"i told my mom agrees with me, not that i agree with her"-nusrat said.
"i played by rules mr.bozo"-he added.
"ok,enlighten me abt the rules of this err game"..the plump man prodded.
nusrat's eyes lit like a shining star.he leaned forward .
"this game is about two people for two people.i have to ask u to jaoin for a demo mr.bozo"nusrat smiled.
mr.bozo showing in an air of indifference offered.
"make a cross across the table with the chalk"-nusrat demanded.
.bozo carefully chalked a cross.his cross was christian with one line obviuosly shorter.
and as nusrat told him it had to divide the table into four it did leaving two rectangles visibly shorter than the other two.nusrat grinned in delight.
"now the second rule of the game .u have to succeed in what i tell u to do to ur cross"nusrat said.
he waited,he had started to perspire.
"now imagine this a city and u have to place ur church on the centre point give me a plan of four houses such that all of them are equidistant from the church and from the four roads u drew"-nusrat said.
"thats impossible"-the man said.
"thats why the other two boys were killed.because they made it impossible for four individuals to get equal oppurtunities to God by drawing the cross christian.when religion is in ur head even while interrogating me , and as long as cross is religion for you, i shall continue my journey of destruction.goodbye mr.bozo.u lost the game"nusrat ended his speech with slitting his throat with the flick of his sharp knife and escaped from the window.
"this is the second time"-he said"and ur still not sorry?"
silence.
"i am sorry"-nusrat said.
"and..."urged the man.
"that the world is full of the dumbest people i know and u have successfully gained a position in my list."
"you have left me no choice"the man bellowed.
"there is always one more choice"nusrat said as if to himself.
going to a flashback in this part of a story is not good.even the readers expect that.but readers want reason of the characters they confront.and all this would only deepen a sense of satisfaction.so be it.
"i told my mommy"-nusrat
"and ur mommy allowed u?"he asked.
"she agrees that crime and punishment come to honourable men"-he said
"so u agree that u have committed a crime?"the man said lit with hope.
"i told my mom agrees with me, not that i agree with her"-nusrat said.
"i played by rules mr.bozo"-he added.
"ok,enlighten me abt the rules of this err game"..the plump man prodded.
nusrat's eyes lit like a shining star.he leaned forward .
"this game is about two people for two people.i have to ask u to jaoin for a demo mr.bozo"nusrat smiled.
mr.bozo showing in an air of indifference offered.
"make a cross across the table with the chalk"-nusrat demanded.
.bozo carefully chalked a cross.his cross was christian with one line obviuosly shorter.
and as nusrat told him it had to divide the table into four it did leaving two rectangles visibly shorter than the other two.nusrat grinned in delight.
"now the second rule of the game .u have to succeed in what i tell u to do to ur cross"nusrat said.
he waited,he had started to perspire.
"now imagine this a city and u have to place ur church on the centre point give me a plan of four houses such that all of them are equidistant from the church and from the four roads u drew"-nusrat said.
"thats impossible"-the man said.
"thats why the other two boys were killed.because they made it impossible for four individuals to get equal oppurtunities to God by drawing the cross christian.when religion is in ur head even while interrogating me , and as long as cross is religion for you, i shall continue my journey of destruction.goodbye mr.bozo.u lost the game"nusrat ended his speech with slitting his throat with the flick of his sharp knife and escaped from the window.
THE CROSS
nusrat sat down on the leather chair,his face drawn ,expressionless.he had crystal blue eyes but his gaze carried far off into a world of his own.the plump man sitting across him was definitely getting irritated.
"this is the second time"-he said"and ur still not sorry?"
silence.
"i am sorry"-nusrat said.
"and..."urged the man.
"that the world is full of the dumbest people i know and u have successfully gained a position in my list."
"you have left me no choice"the man bellowed.
"there is always one more choice"nusrat said as if to himself.
going to a flashback in this part of a story is not good.even the readers expect that.but readers want reason of the characters they confront.and all this would only deepen a sense of satisfaction.so be it.
"i told my mommy"-nusrat
"and ur mommy allowed u?"he asked.
"she agrees that crime and punishment come to honourable men"-he said
"so u agree that u have committed a crime?"the man said lit with hope.
"i told my mom agrees with me, not that i agree with her"-nusrat said.
"i played by rules mr.bozo"-he added.
"ok,enlighten me abt the rules of this err game"..the plump man prodded.
nusrat's eyes lit like a shining star.he leaned forward .
"this game is about two people for two people.i have to ask u to jaoin for a demo mr.bozo"nusrat smiled.
mr.bozo showing in an air of indifference offered.
"make a cross across the table with the chalk"-nusrat demanded.
.bozo carefully chalked a cross.his cross was christian with one line obviuosly shorter.
and as nusrat told him it had to divide the table into four it did leaving two rectangles visibly shorter than the other two.nusrat grinned in delight.
"now the second rule of the game .u have to succeed in what i tell u to do to ur cross"nusrat said.
he waited,he had started to perspire.
"now imagine this a city and u have to place ur church on the centre point give me a plan of four houses such that all of them are equidistant from the church and from the four roads u drew"-nusrat said.
"thats impossible"-the man said.
"thats why the other two boys were killed.because they made it impossible for four individuals to get equal oppurtunities to God by drawing the cross christian.when religion is in ur head even while interrogating me , and as long as cross is religion for you, i shall continue my journey of destruction.goodbye mr.bozo.u lost the game"nusrat ended his speech with slitting his throat with the flick of his sharp knife and escaped from the window.
"this is the second time"-he said"and ur still not sorry?"
silence.
"i am sorry"-nusrat said.
"and..."urged the man.
"that the world is full of the dumbest people i know and u have successfully gained a position in my list."
"you have left me no choice"the man bellowed.
"there is always one more choice"nusrat said as if to himself.
going to a flashback in this part of a story is not good.even the readers expect that.but readers want reason of the characters they confront.and all this would only deepen a sense of satisfaction.so be it.
"i told my mommy"-nusrat
"and ur mommy allowed u?"he asked.
"she agrees that crime and punishment come to honourable men"-he said
"so u agree that u have committed a crime?"the man said lit with hope.
"i told my mom agrees with me, not that i agree with her"-nusrat said.
"i played by rules mr.bozo"-he added.
"ok,enlighten me abt the rules of this err game"..the plump man prodded.
nusrat's eyes lit like a shining star.he leaned forward .
"this game is about two people for two people.i have to ask u to jaoin for a demo mr.bozo"nusrat smiled.
mr.bozo showing in an air of indifference offered.
"make a cross across the table with the chalk"-nusrat demanded.
.bozo carefully chalked a cross.his cross was christian with one line obviuosly shorter.
and as nusrat told him it had to divide the table into four it did leaving two rectangles visibly shorter than the other two.nusrat grinned in delight.
"now the second rule of the game .u have to succeed in what i tell u to do to ur cross"nusrat said.
he waited,he had started to perspire.
"now imagine this a city and u have to place ur church on the centre point give me a plan of four houses such that all of them are equidistant from the church and from the four roads u drew"-nusrat said.
"thats impossible"-the man said.
"thats why the other two boys were killed.because they made it impossible for four individuals to get equal oppurtunities to God by drawing the cross christian.when religion is in ur head even while interrogating me , and as long as cross is religion for you, i shall continue my journey of destruction.goodbye mr.bozo.u lost the game"nusrat ended his speech with slitting his throat with the flick of his sharp knife and escaped from the window.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
loochi
loochi was standing below 3 star hotel...she wanted to go into dominoes.but it was all filled up.she wanted to eat her fav chicket wings so she decided to wait.suddenly the lights went out.she thought maybe it was not wise after all to venture out alone, and that too for a taste of chicken wings.but loochi was no chicken, she was brave, thats what she told herself.the rain was not stopping.the roads ahead were illuminated by the occasional headlights of coming vehicles.a car would not be a bad idea she thought.at least she wudnt have to worry abt transport.and then that loneliness, again why did she keep getting back these flashbacks.she was sick of them.
loud laughing noise...a bunch of boys..had gathered around the spot were loochi stood.they were using lewd vocab and husky vocals..and cracking jokes at passerbys.obviously intimidated the passerbys preffered to go on and not look.loochi was caught in a spot where if she would go forward she had to cross them,and then she would have nowhr to go but back.and why would she deny herself chicken wings because of some rowdys..she wasnt scared,but yes she was worried.suddenly one of the guys spotted her.a tone of hushed mischievious planning and then all those eyes stared at her.
this disturbed loochi.she made out clearly three lanky figures in black..roadside culture stamped on them.she ignored them,and suddenly one of them came up to her,she jolted back...
trained in martial arts she knew the fastest manuevres but she was in panic and she cud not think.but the grin on the man's face made loochi's blood boil.a ketchup bottle her hands found,she smashed it within seconds on the guys head.loochi was so fast that the other 2 guys stared bluntly.was it blood or ketchup on his head ,loochi thought.he dropped on her feet and she decided she made the impact quite effectively the guy fainted before uttering anything.
the whole place was frozen and u would expect the other guys to fly into rage but loochi did evrything right.she picked up the broken bottle and started swaying it in the air.and she gave her message a broken bottle is even more deadly.they picked up their comrades and fled.
loochi stood there, the dominos guy called out to her..she went inside and had her dinner.somepart of her was lonely and the other part proud that she blew the daylight out of those roadies.the other people in the place looked respectfully at her, she didnt show any emotion,as she was trained to, respect from dead people she supposed.on her way out she took a gudang garam,smiled at her self ,smoked the cig under the umbrella and headed towards hostel.
loud laughing noise...a bunch of boys..had gathered around the spot were loochi stood.they were using lewd vocab and husky vocals..and cracking jokes at passerbys.obviously intimidated the passerbys preffered to go on and not look.loochi was caught in a spot where if she would go forward she had to cross them,and then she would have nowhr to go but back.and why would she deny herself chicken wings because of some rowdys..she wasnt scared,but yes she was worried.suddenly one of the guys spotted her.a tone of hushed mischievious planning and then all those eyes stared at her.
this disturbed loochi.she made out clearly three lanky figures in black..roadside culture stamped on them.she ignored them,and suddenly one of them came up to her,she jolted back...
trained in martial arts she knew the fastest manuevres but she was in panic and she cud not think.but the grin on the man's face made loochi's blood boil.a ketchup bottle her hands found,she smashed it within seconds on the guys head.loochi was so fast that the other 2 guys stared bluntly.was it blood or ketchup on his head ,loochi thought.he dropped on her feet and she decided she made the impact quite effectively the guy fainted before uttering anything.
the whole place was frozen and u would expect the other guys to fly into rage but loochi did evrything right.she picked up the broken bottle and started swaying it in the air.and she gave her message a broken bottle is even more deadly.they picked up their comrades and fled.
loochi stood there, the dominos guy called out to her..she went inside and had her dinner.somepart of her was lonely and the other part proud that she blew the daylight out of those roadies.the other people in the place looked respectfully at her, she didnt show any emotion,as she was trained to, respect from dead people she supposed.on her way out she took a gudang garam,smiled at her self ,smoked the cig under the umbrella and headed towards hostel.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
holi
holi has come,seasons change but the mood remains the same.i was happy for a couple of hours yesterday,just being there i guess.otherwise things are nasty,as nasty as they could get.wishing holi is far fetched thought,wishing good luck was an everyday affair.i could go on ahead and meet em guys but alas,fault of mine ,poor wretched soul i have been cursed of not moving that way.it has been my wish to see em beasties where they are seated and everythings fine and stuff like a good samartian.but i have denied myself that luxury and it chokes midway down my ailementary canal.happy holi or happy diwali i think the first word is missing eh..
Monday, March 17, 2008
rock in india
the topic is changing.how about the biggest thrash metal gig in india.9 bands one aim all the fukking headbanging u cud ever afford.the crowd was super and the energy was exhilerating.not all the bands did their best,but we liked some of the indian bands too much.there was one band named mother jane and one called millenium.both had extraordinary musicians.megadeth given only an hour,did the best they cud they rocked ...it was so fukking crazy..weed all over the air,whiskey shots,headbanging,real awesome experience.we went home in silence but we realized thrs only silence and metal,in between evrything is small talk
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